Trading Momma's China For Lovely Loneliness

It seems silly to be so concerned about a life of spinsterhood when one is in her twenties. Life has just begun, no? But shouldn't the time be now where we begin building our lives of settlement? A lady must

• find a mate
• make sure that mate is the right mate
• stay with that mate
• marry that mate
• buy a house with that mate
• make babies with that mate

The list continues. Notice that I don't even have the first bullet point crossed off. This ideal of companionship--marriage, which would eliminate any notions of spinsterhood, requires a great deal of time, at least for this young bitty, and time is only passing with empty fists--no rings, no promises. Yes, one is only in her twenties, with the world at her feet, but those same feet creep closer and closer to an age where "finding the one" becomes mere satire. So one must throw her empty fists in the face of time and say, "You win," spinsterhood it is, and embrace being independent, because do you hear wedding bells? I don't. 

I am not the only young bitty concerning themselves with the cold hard facts of spinsterhood. The concept of onset spinsterhood for the twenty-something has become fictionalized as well! Check out a chapter from The Twenty-Something's Guide to Spinsterhood here. It is more comical than anything, but the idea that this lifestyle not only pertains to older woman, but to young females as well, is percolating amongst women in the 21st century. 

There are other interesting essays putting spinsterhood in a kinder light. Check out Mary Farmer's essay on "The Truth About Spinster" here. She delves into the historical context of "spinster" and, in a sense, glorifies the spinster of the past, saying most were well respected women due to their education and leadership skills. She ties this to spinsters of the 21st century, saying they should kick back and "count their blessings" because they truly live a life of respect and a life of freedom. Another posting talks about the multiple benefits of said "spinsterhood," claiming that getting married and "churning out kids" is not the only way to truly experience womanhood. She enthusiastically writes about her countless trips to Europe and her ability to pursue her writing career. For more information on this wild cat, click here.

So I will tuck away any dreams of gold bands or mom's old bone china, and look forward to not looking forward to settling down. Perhaps I do not meet the qualifications of spinsterhood, but I am not afraid of approaching it. There are too many lovely people and places in the world, I should not be tied down to specifics. So bring on the knitting, and bring on the cats! And of course, please bring on the wine.